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Welcome!! What do you want more in life?? What inspires you!!! I would love to hear from you!! Dream Big! Connie

French Chandeliers Inspire Me!

Hi Brandie! Thanks for joining!! What do you want more of in your life!!! Looking forward to hearing from you!!! Best, Connie

Im at a crossroad in my life right now, not only do I not know what road to take, I dont even see the roads yet ...

Good Afternoon Moms!! What would make your day a 10? We would love to hear from you!! Be your best! Connie

Hi... I am new to this site --- it seems great!! I am a busy mom of two and work full time but I do feel like I have lost myself and my creativity has been tossed aside ... it is all about everybody else and I am exhausted. A 3 yr.old boy and 1month old baby girl --- beautiful, healthy babies ....

Gotta LOVE the SYSTEM... The child support system, that is. BOTH of exes (it sounds awful I know- I really know how to pick em) have been on probation for non-payment for a little over a year. They (THE OAG) revoked the first one's probation last month, which should have sent him to jail for six months or until he paid a significant amount of the back child support that he owes, but instead the judge gave him until September 30th to report for jail. All because he had finally filed his income tax and was expecting a rather large return. That return will eventually make it's way into my account but the TEXAS AG's office holds it for 120 days to draw interest. First the IRS has to process it, then the AG confiscates it, and holds it, anticipated arrival date to me= September-ish! Anyway, today was ex #2's turn. Same story... NOPE. He didn't show up. So they issued a warrant and set his bond amount at a whopping $14,000.00. What they don't tell you is that this warrant is ONLY issued for failure to appear- NOT for contempt of court (in Texas failure to pay is contempt). So if and when they finally pick him up (and that is assuming that he's not arrested for his other CP case first- warrant issued two months ago- I tell ya I can pick some WINNERS) I'll have to go back to court and tell the judge I want his probation revoked. Once that happens, he'll spend the six months in jail and then some until he pays what ever the original bond agreement was on the probation order. Why can't this be a simple process? Why do they let these deadbeat parents keep getting away with this? I've been doing this collectively for about five years now. A leopard doesn't change his spots. What makes them think he/they are going to wake up remorseful and sad that they owe thousands of dollars and actually start paying on time, everytime and in full? Why aren't there stricter laws, more enforcements and more strenous sentences? Ok, so if I am logical about this, neither of them sitting in jail for six months is going to do me any good because they don't earn any money in jail, and when they get out it'll be harder for them to find jobs. And lets face it in todays economy if they can't get a job (or keep one) now, will they after six months in the county pokey? Probably not, but lets face it: They aren't just snubbing the SYSTEM; they are hurting their kids. I am sure that there are other mothers out there who not only NEED that child support, they suffer with out it and are greatful when they do get it because it means being able to buy those shoes the kids so desperatly needed three months ago, or that special treat your kid so deserves (like two weeks at space camp) for making the A Honor Roll all year (real examples). I am in that boat. I need that money to support my kids, not for luxuries. we eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches one or two nights a week so that i have the money for gas in my truck. Every other month I am begging some utility company to give me just a few more days. And I make decent money, it's just not enough. Loser # 1, says to me that he doesnt' see his kids often because he doesn't want to listen to me complain about not getting child support- If he took the time to read his custody paperwork it tells him I can't keep him from seeing the kids no matter how much $$ he owes me. Loser # 2 has never seen his son, he's an even bigger coward! His excuse " He never told me he wanted kids and if he had to help raise his one, he knew I'd ask him to help with the two I already had" THAT NEON LIGHT YOU SEE BLINKING IS ATTACHED TO MY FORHEAD IT READS: "I LIKE LOSERS, BUT IT'S OK... MY TUBES ARE TIED" And my sister wonders why I don't date! HA.... The moral of this rant is I am considering a grass roots campaign to oust our Texas Attorney General and replace him with a single mom. Sure he has other legal matters to worry about, but my stomach does flip flops when he stands at a podium and raves about what a great job he's doing. Not to mention- he's a moron!

I am exhausted again. I ended up accidentally taking a three hour nap yesterday, then staying up until one in the morning. Slept through the alarm and now here I am again.... Almost midnight. Need to get some sleep, need to make sure I turn the volume up on the alarm clock. Since my dad had his strokes in December I haven't stopped going. Every day for six months while he was in the hospital we drove the 20 or so miles each way to the medical center so he wouldn't have to be by himself and so that I could know what was going on. He's been home for a little over a month now and I still haven't stopped moving. Every week he has atleast one doctors appointment. I have three kids (who miss their activites dearly) and a full time job. Did I mention I am a single mom, dealing with quarterly trips to court for child support that I don't get. My cup runneth over as my grandmother would say, but there is no end in sight. Today, when I told my dad that I needed to make time to go to the doctor myself, because I am begining to wonder if this tired thing isn't more serious. He told me that I wouldn't have time to go because he wanted to go to Whataburger after his appointments. I need to figure out a way to get him to understand that it's not all about him.... Any suggestions? It's his brain injury that is causing this, seven months ago, he would have taken the day off work to take me to the doctor. Makes me sad.

With Father's Day fast approaching, I always get a sense of dread.... My older two children have a stunted relationship with their father (no one's fault but his) and my youngest son has never met his father. (also no one's fault but his) I keep waiting for my precious 3 year old to ask the dreaded question "Where is my father?," but it hasn't happened yet. Oddly, he does ask questions about my older kids dad. Is it possible that the concept of a "father for him" is such a foreign concept that he'll never question it. Or will the day come that he hates me for not having one. ( I went through the gamut of emotions not having a mother growing up, so I somewhat expect any number of scenarios.) I usually make a big deal for the grandfather's (my 1st ex's dad and mine) and forget the "dad's" (or donors as I call them when my children aren't around). One year, I had planned on posting signs around the neighborhood that my exes lived in "Happy father's day to..... Have you seen him? " but I realized how cruel that would be to my children had they been old enough to read/understand. DON'T WORRY, I DIDN'T DO IT! Then there is my dad. I know I have briefly mentioned it, but in December, he had several strokes. He's functioning at a much higher rate than anyone expected him to be at this point. So I really want to make this day a special day for him. (His birthday is also Monday th 22nd). I figure he really deserves to celebrate himself and his life and his accomplishments after all that he's been through. Unfortunatly, with being his sole provider financially, I can't really afford an elaborate gift or even a nice dinner out. I would love some suggestions on how to take the focus off of the strokes dad had and put it back on the man we know and love and are so grateful and blessed to still have in our lives.

Originally Posted by algolden_820 in Imperfect ParentsOriginally Posted by algolden_820 in algolden_820's CircleEmbarking on a new "adventure" in single motherhood and a little freaked out. I think I met someone. We've been flirting back and forth for about a week now on fb and texting. ALOT! He's an old friend of my dad's... 15 years older than me AND when I was ten, he made wendy's frosty come out of my nose every time I laughed (or smiled or whatever---- I had the BIGGEST CRUSH ON HIM IS the point). He did come over for dinner this weekend, but as my dad's old friend.... not as someone I was interested in. I have no idea what I am doing. He knows I had the crush on him "back in the day" and he occasionally points it out to me, in a joking manner of course. I am freaking out not over the age thing (my youngest son's "father" is ten years older), not because he was a friend of my dads (although that is a little weird I must admit and dad made a point to tell me that he was only out for one thing- another story all together), not because even after all these years I still have a school girl like crush on him (even with 15 years of aging and a few extra pounds on both of us.... ), but because I have NO IDEA WHAT I AM DOING! The flirting thing is odd... sometimes we get the joke, sometimes we don't. I can say for all those single mom's out there, don't text and flirt!!! More over, I was burned big time by D's father and scared to death it'll happen again. With all the drama I already have in my life, I don't want to add more to it. And I don't want to expose my kids to anymore heartbreak. ( I wouldn't be bringing them around him in the begining anyway, but still). And then there's the horrible guilt for actually thinking of myself. I never do that. I don't care what ex # 1 thinks. ... he had an affair with a 17 year old when we were together whom he's now married to and has two other children. Ex # 2 isn't in the picture so I don't have to worry about that... But will my chidren hate me for dumping them with a sitter and going out and having fun.... will my father (who has openly expressed his certainty that no one could ever like me for anything other than eh-hemmm and who has told countless doctors over the past seven months that I will NEVER meet someone because I wouldn't abandon him) be able to get over it and understand (brain damage with standing). Will he be able to be OK with the fact that this particular guy used to be his protege'..... WHY CAN'T IT JUST BE EASY?

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Originally Posted by algolden_820 in algolden_820's CircleMy inner Carrie Bradshaw! This dating thing is for the birds!!!! Or maybe just single people without children or drama under the age of 25. I didn't KNOW I was in a relationship!!!! How is that possible? What is the definition of a "relationship" anyway. Just because we talk on the phone (almost daily) and text over 100 times a day (excessive I know). DOES THAT CONSITUTE A RELATIONSHIP? I didn't know it did. We've seen each other three times in that two month time frame. THREE TIMES. We haven't been out on a "date" although I don't think I would know what to do with that either. There have been no conversations of "exclusive or we're dating". Just because a guy calls me baby once. Does that mean I belong to him? Ok, so what if I wouldn't mind that to terribly, but I don't want to skip straight to the I love you's. I want to take things slow and ENJOY the little moments? And what if I don't know how to say those things out loud? and neither does he.... Pink Floyd... (whom I do not like) two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl.

Originally Posted by algolden_820 in algolden_820's CircleAt 32 years old, I just did something so completly juvenile. I just disowned my little brother. He's 25 and he's made a pretty big mess of his life, just as I did at 25. Well, his is actually a little worse, but not much. With all the family crisis we have had in the last 10 months he has been no where. I have to bribe him with money to come visit my father and now that my grandmother is dying.... When he was in Diluth I gave him his excuses. Now he's an hour away, AN HOUR.... and he's been here over two months, seen my father once and my grandmother once. The only reason he's seen my father is because I paid for him to go out with us one night and there was alcohol involved. My 70 year old Aunt called him the other day on my behalf and he 'promised' her that he would come help me tomorrow get the house ready for grandma to come home from the hospital. Tonight he not only lied to me, but he told me yet again, that "his family" was more important than mine. His family consists of a 4 year old child in W. Virginia that he hasn't seen since he was 5 months old, with an ex wife who is literally certifiable and a child who just turned two by a girl who he met when she was 16 and he 21. But he now has the protection of his mother (my ex step mother) and she's paying for a roof over his head, a car for him to drive and what ever the GI bill (he was kicked out of the Navy because of his crazy ex wife, but still qualifies) doesn't cover. My family consists of THE BAD, my DAD and my Grandma, not to mention so many others. My father was a single father for most of our lives. He was married to my brother's mom for seven years, and she cheated, lied and did drugs. When they split up, my brother was three, and we all moved in with my grandmother. She helped my father raise all of us. She comforted my brother when his mother lied to him, when she no showed on him. She even lied to him to make him feel better about his mother's lack of parenting skills. I am so hurt and so angry, and I can't believe the words " Don't bother showing up to her funeral" actually came out of my mouth. I even went so far as to tell him not to expect phone call when she dies. I know I already regret it, but the sad part is I meant it. I know family isn't perfect, we all have our drama, and our nuances, and differences. I know that he cares, but why doesn't anyone care as much as I do? Why is it that out of my grandmother's two children (my father- who is disabled now_ and his sister, their 8 children - and 19 great grandchildren (all of which are 13 or under) I am the ONLY ONE that is here. My grandmother deserves better.

Debbi's Favorites and Fabulous Links I want to share with The Motherhood ~ including Fashion, Homes, Interiors and Travel. http://modernmomontherun.blogspot.com/2009/09/luxury-life-style-connoisseur.html

I opted out of my EXTRA work on the new series TRAUMA, scheduled for thursday, monday and tuesday because i didn't want to miss my son chase's last two football games ~ and the casting gal told me they wanted me to be the flight attendant! darn!  maybe i would have made the scene / screen ?  my son and husband encouraged me to go.  but.... i just couldn't.   .....decisions of a modern mom!