No matter your political affiliation, you gotta admit some editor had fun with that headline.

Bad Day At Hallmark Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day........ //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// My tire was thumping. I thought it was flat When I looked at the tire... I noticed your cat. Sorry! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heard your wife left you, How upset you must be. But don't fret about it... She moved in with me. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but wonder... 'What the hell was I thinking?' ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Congratulations on your wedding day! Too bad no one likes your husband. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ How could two people as beautiful as you Have such an ugly baby? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. After having met you .. I've changed my mind. -------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------- I must admit, you brought Religion into my life. I never believed in Hell until I met you. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am.... That you're not here to ruin it for me. #################################################### Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go... Would you like to take this knife out of my back? You'll probably need it again. ******************************************************************************** Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia ) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Happy birthday! You look great for your age. Almost Lifelike! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise... ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// We have been friends for a very long time .. let's say we stop? +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I'm so miserable without you it's almost like you're here. ===================================================== Congratulations on your new bundle of joy. Did you ever find out who the father was? %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday. So we're having you put to sleep. )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) So your daughter's a hooker, and it spoiled your day. Look at the bright side, it's really good pay.

My son(4yrs.old) said "mommy I want to go to the scooter store" and I reluctantly said "why?" and he said"to buy you a scooter mom". I then said "I'm to young for a scooter" more than slightly offended and then he said"no your not!". I then thought for a split second about arguing with him but all I could hear in my head was no I'm not from me and yes you are from him which would of lead to the inevitable sticking of my tongue out at him which would've shown him my true age...which is 39!

Inspiration Procrastination Poster You must click the link to see it: http://www.icanhasmotivation.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/ichmpro1.jpg

My six year old daughter asked me to make Mashed potatoes for dinner.... when I asked her why she said "Mooomm, Everyone knows they make your boobies grow!"

Who You Gonna Call?

I needed a giggle this morning....this is it. http://www.reallybadparentingadvice.com/rule-12-screw-tradition-when-naming-your-baby/

A new fav: Crap At My Parent's House http://crapatmyparentshouse.com/ Here is the description: The goal of Crap At My Parents House is to pay homage to all of the weird crap that everyone's parents have. Please help in this project by submitting anything you deem funny, weird, odd, unique, strange, absurd, ridiculous or just plain terrifying. (Yes, that Crisco can says, "It's Digestible")

This is the funniest commercial I have seen in a long time! Too bad my kids are out of diapers, or I would so be buying these, and teaching them to say "I poo in blue!"

Reasoning With Vampires http://reasoningwithvampires.tumblr.com/ A website dedicating to editing the Twilight books - and I admit, some of it's pretty funny LOL!

A Template for Every Awful Facebook Discussion You've Ever Witnessed.... http://www.someecards.com/2011/01/23/a-template-for-every-awful-facebook-discussion-youve-ever-witnessed

The 10 Most Irritating Least Helpful Parenting Tips Ever..... I'm sure we've never heard ANY of these....;) http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/parenting/the-10-most-irritating-least-helpful-parenting-tips-ever-2448391/

When U.S. commandos stormed Osama bin Laden's compound earlier this month, they spent much of their time on the ground shoving papers, CDs and thumb drives into huge document bags strung around their necks. That sweep was considered an integral part of the operation, and it confirmed what the intelligence community had long believed: that bin Laden was obsessive about documenting everything.

From its earliest days, al-Qaida leaders insisted on receipts. If fighters were buying a car for an operation, or even disc drives and floppy disks for their computers, they were required to return to base with a precise accounting of everything they had spent.

Experts say that was the influence of bin Laden. Before he became the ideological leader of al-Qaida, he got an undergraduate degree in economics and public administration. He clearly applied what he learned to the organization.

Read the rest here:
http://www.npr.org/2011/05/31/136721965/al-qaidas-paper-trail-a-treasure-trove-for-u-s

Maybe, it's just me but if he would have had a liberal arts degree, perhaps his organization would have been more successful. I like how this works out. ;)

TRANSPORTING food into a field to eat it is a worthless endeavour, it was claimed last night.
As the weather momentarily improved over the weekend, thousands of Britons travelled long distances with heavy bags of provisions to lay down blankets which immediately became insanitary.
Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: "Initiating a picnic is basically making a decision to have your food shat on by tiny insects.
To read more of this very true, yet it won't stop you from forcing your poor family in enduring several of these *meals* each summer, go here:http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/society/Picnics-even-shitter-than-barbecues-201108014142/

On one hand, it's so cruel to lie to your kids. On the other? The reactions are priceless. The two boys at the end? I just want to go and chat with them some more!