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Plastic-Free: How I Kicked the Plastic Habit, and How You Can Too

June 18, 2012 by The Motherhood

To be clear, the “I” in the title of this post refers to Beth Terry, whose book of the same name we discussed in The Motherhood today. The “I” who is writing this post is pausing to stare somewhat guiltily over her shoulder at the plastic clamshell container, plastic zipper lock bags, plastic ballpoint pens and plastic aspirin bottle on her kitchen counter. And that’s just the counter–we won’t even discuss the plastic in the rest of the room. And house.

 

But Beth’s book isn’t designed to make us feel guilty. It’s written with the intent of helping anybody take whatever steps they’re ready for to reduce plastic in their lives, up to eliminating it all together. Beth decided to write the book after she stumbled across an article about the plastic pollution problem in the ocean and saw a photo of a dead baby albatross full of everyday plastic pieces that its mother had fed to it thinking it was food.  Of the article, Beth says, “It broke my heart. And that was my reason for seeing if I could live without buying new plastic.”

 

 

It occurs to me, as a human mama, that I also feed my children a lot of things I think are good for them. But I do worry that the plastic that food comes packaged in could somehow be as harmful to my babies as to that baby albatross. And I know I’m not alone in my concerns. Many of the panelists joining the discussion on Beth’s book feel the same. Panelist Alicia Voorhies says her biggest concern about plastic is leaching chemicals, and panelist Lisa Sharp is worried about “the health effects on us and animals.” Panelists Kitchenstew and Lori pointed out the pervasiveness of plastic–it’s even in chewing gum! Theecochic, another panelist, admitted honestly that her biggest concern about plastic is that she relies on it so much. It’s so easy to do, and so hard to avoid. Panelist Danielle says, “My biggest concerns about plastics are that they are trashing our planet– from preproduction to litter.”

 

It’s everywhere. It’s bad for us, other animals, and the planet, in ways we don’t even fully understand yet.  If it were only bad, it would be easy to get rid of. But it’s so useful and convenient, as we all know. What are health-conscious, environmentally-conscious, busy and cash-strapped moms to do? That’s where Beth’s book, and her blog, come in, with practical, realistic options anyone can use to help get plastic out of their lives.

 

What if you’re just a beginner at this plastic-free stuff? What’s the first thing you should do? Beth says that the best “first thing” depends on the person doing it. “Start with the one thing that is easiest for you and make it a habit. And don’t beat yourself up, but don’t let yourself off the hook too easily either.” You may have started the shift without even knowing it–lots of us have stopped buying bottled water and are using stainless steel bottles. Even more of us are using reusable grocery bags. Lori advises, “Incorporating the change into your routine works. I leave reusable shopping bags in the front seat of my car and now I rarely forget them.” And as panelist PhDinParenting observes, “A lot of the changes we make become second nature after we’ve been doing them for a while.”

 

Those are some of the easier changes to make.   But as Kitchenstew points out, having kids makes going plastic-free very challenging. Two big challenges are toys (since most little kids’ toys are made out of plastic) and goody bags at parties (the bags are made of plastic and they’re often filled with cheap plastic toys). For the former challenge, consider buying used toys on eBay or Craigslist, as Danielle does. As for goody bags, if you can’t bear to eliminate gifts for party guests entirely, why not try something plastic-free and still fun, like flower seeds in compostable planters or cotton thread friendship bracelets?

 

Perhaps the biggest challenge to plastic-free living with kids is containers for their food, especially on the go. Fortunately, as more of us raise our voices to ask for options, more choices appear. Lunchbots are a great stainless steel alternative. The Extraordinary Baby Shoppe carries several stainless steel feeding options for the smallest kids. For reusable food storage bags, check out Lunch Skins or Three Little Birds Design Company. More great ideas can be found in this blog post about traveling plastic-free with snacks.

 

Those are some great ideas for keeping plastic out of the garbage–but what about what we put the garbage itself in? Some municipalities require trash bags. One solution is to reduce your trash (and therefore, the number of trash bags you use) by composting and recycling whenever possible.  Another is to use corn-based trash bags or using plastic bags, like bread bags, that you were just going to throw out anyway.  Panelist Diane Mac suggests wrapping wet non-compostables in newspaper. If you aren’t required to use bags, consider putting your trash in a metal can that you can rinse out as needed with a hose. And check out Beth’s blog post on collecting garbage without plastic bags.

 

It’s all very well to contribute to a cleaner planet by using less plastic, but try to get yourself clean without plastic? You’re facing a challenge. Let’s play a game: you run out to the grocery store, find a non-plastic container of shampoo or mouthwash, and run back. First one home gets a prize. Go on. I’ll wait here.

 

(crickets chirping)

 

Couldn’t find one? Not surprising; it’s hard to do. Our panelists were able to come up with some choices  for those truly committed to kicking the plastic. Shampoo bars, especially those not wrapped in plastic, are a good option. Lisa Sharp uses concentrated mouthwash so that the bottle is smaller and lasts longer, creating less waste. You can make your own hygiene products, too, and Beth’s book and blog offer ideas for plastic-free alternatives. You may even find alternatives to plastic in places you didn’t even realize plastic lurks, like books. But Beth has even found a way around that: “FYI: This book was created without plastic materials. My publisher found a way to do without plastic coating, plastic glue, synthetic thread, etc. It’s really cool looking. But it’s also available in Kindle and NOOK. “If you’re interested in a signed copy of the book, they’re available through Beth’s website, with a portion of the proceeds to the Plastic Pollution Coalition.

 

Filed Under: Research & Insights Tagged With: Author, Becki King, Live Talks, Plastic-Free

Moms Who Win: Entering Sweepstakes Online

June 8, 2012 by The Motherhood

You probably see them often – “Win a trip for two,” or “Enter to win a new iPhone” – but have you ever taken the plunge and entered a sweepstakes or giveaway?

 

Shannon Schulte of Sweepstakes Mama joined a group of interested moms in The Motherhood to talk about how to find legitimate online sweepstakes and enter to win.  She knows what she’s talking about: “I spend at least 6 hrs a day entering sweepstakes! To me, it’s worth it,” she said. “Last year I won 11 trips, 10 iPads, thousands of dollars of gift cards and more. This year, I won money to buy a new car.”

 

If you’re new to the world of online contests, you should start by setting up Google Alerts for the keyword “sweepstakes” or “enter to win.”

 

“We offer FREE Google Alerts classes monthly! This month will be 6/22 at 9pm on Twitter! We’ll use hashtag #GoogleAlerts. Join us!” said Shannon.

 

She also noted that her website is also a great free resource for finding sweepstakes, and beginners should start with the Instant Win page, then move on to Dailies. “Get organized by bookmarking great sweeps with their end date and putting them in folders by priority. That way, it’s easy to go back and enter what you have time for, and delete expiring sweepstakes.”

 

“I have the best luck for sweeps on Twitter, Facebook, and contest websites,” said amyl12. “There’s a promotion tab on FB that shows you the latest sweeps.”

 

Added valerie2350, “Websites for local radio, TV and news are a great source for local sweepstakes – I have a bunch of them bookmarked and check back regularly for new ones.”

 

Candypo encouraged people not to overlook Pinterest, too. “The contests on Pintrest are great because right now not too many people enter them,” she said, and Shannon agreed, “I love Pin to Win on Pinterest. Try searching Pin to win or repin to win to find more! It’s up and coming like Twitter was a couple years ago! Great odds!”

 

 

To increase your odds of winning Instant Win games, Shannon recommended signing on “VERY early or VERY late, holidays, weekends. Whenever you wouldn’t want to be online, that’s when to play.”

 

There can be drawbacks to entering contests if you aren’t careful.  To avoid inadvertently infecting your computer with a virus while entering sweepstakes, Candypo recommends “malware software that also catches phishers. I’ve noticed it’s mostly spam mail that you can get” after entering the contest.  And steer clear of spam or scams by “visiting brands’ websites you recognize. Every sweepstakes that’s legit has official rules. Be sure to read them. If it seems sketchy, it probably is,” Shannon said.

 

When you do win, remember that you will need to pay taxes on your prizes.  Shannon recommends 33% of the prize value as a good rule of thumb. “Some sweepstakes offer extra cash to cover the taxes. But in most cases I would recommend saving to cover your wins,” said Candypo.

 

The bottom line, as tamaraben pointed out, is that “if you don’t enter, you can’t win.”

 

If you decide to give it a try, best of luck and let us know how you do!

Filed Under: Research & Insights, Trending & Social Media Tagged With: Contests, Giveaways, Live Talks, Shannon Schulte, Sweepstakes, Win

Managing Food Allergy Anxieties

June 5, 2012 by The Motherhood

If you and your kids don’t have food allergies, you probably didn’t think twice about the peanut butter you slathered onto your PB&J sandwich the other day, or the milk you poured over your cereal this morning.  But for some families, such foods can be a much more serious matter.

 

Today in The Motherhood, Lori Sandler of Divvies was joined by psychologist Dr. Jules Spotts and a panel of food allergy-aware co-hosts to discuss how we can manage our own (and our children’s) anxieties around their food allergies.

 

 

Start Early

 

From an early age, you can teach kids to be vigilant about food allergies – but allergies do not need to define them or consume their life.  “We have taught our son, Benjamin, that having food allergies is one piece of the puzzle of self, and the puzzle of your family. Our children are regular people, who happen to have food allergies,” said Lori Sandler of Divvies.

 

“Here are some things that have helped me as a parent,” added Jenny of Nut-Free Mom. “Teach your child to be confident. Praise all the wonderful things about them. They are not just the sum of their allergies even though we sometimes have to discuss allergies more than we would like (in restaurants, etc.) Try to find fun non-food activities that you do regularly as a family. Food is part of the social fabric but it doesn’t have to be the main focus to have a good time.”

 

Take Reasonable Precautions

 

Especially when your kids are young, the idea of going to a restaurant or picking up a snack on the go can be terrifying.  “The anxiety is natural and it will pass as your children get older and you become more comfortable dealing with the food allergies,” said Carmen of Mom to the Screaming Masses.  In the meantime, Lori Sandler suggested packing snacks and speaking with restaurants ahead of time to make accommodations for kids with food allergies.

 

When your child is old enough to attend school, that can present another challenge.  Psychologist Dr. Jules Spotts recommends patience in dealing with school administration as you work with them to ensure your child’s safety. “Stay even in your approach to the school, while you communicate the need to have a safe environment for him, and also one that does not isolate him from social contact and interfere with belongingness in the group,” he said. “Present yourself as quietly firm, decisive, and knowledgeable, and avoid a stance of argumentative leading to litigious.”

 

Read this comment thread for more ideas on helping kids deal with food allergies at school.

 

Don’t Let Food Allergies Isolate You

 

It’s easy to feel isolated by food allergies, especially when you’re afraid to eat outside of the home.  To help avoid those feelings, “Get to know some local places, their owners, and build established trust relationships regarding your daughter and her food needs. Also, do your best to build a network of friends where everyone feels safe in participating in food related activities,” said Dr. Spotts.

 

Eleanor of Food Allergy Initiative and Mamaleibo recommended Chipotle as an allergy-friendly chain Mexican restaurant, with no nuts, fish or eggs.  They also offer corn shells for people with gluten intolerance. Chris S. added, “I love how Jamba Juice will not only make my son’s smoothie in a clean, dairy free blender but also that ‘Dairy Allergy’ is clearly marked on the orders they pass on and on my receipt.”

 

“You also may want to check out www.allergyeats.com – a website that allows food allergy families to post their ratings of restaurants around the country. They have a mobile app too!” said Barbara of Food Allergy Initiative.

 

For more strategies on eating out safely, you can check Sloane Miller’s blog, Allergic Girl, or her book of the same name.  And for more advice on avoiding feelings of isolation related to food allergies, read the comment thread here.

 

 

Help Educate About Food Allergies

 

For kids who are adjusting to food allergies, “FAAN [The Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network] has teen support groups, I believe, and conferences for kids,” said Emily of West of the Loop.

 

Some of the most difficult interactions can take place within your own family, when relatives don’t accept the reality and danger of food allergies.  “All you can do is provide as much information to educate them on it. And sadly, if they still choose to not follow the rules, then you simply can’t allow them to have unsupervised contact with a child who has food allergies,” said Christina of A Mommy Story. “At least until the child is old enough to understand allergies enough to say no to them.”  For more thoughts on this issue, read the comment threads here or here.

 

You can also “try sharing this post with them. I am a pediatric allergist and have children with food allergies,” said Sarah of The Allergist Mom. “This post seemed to help many families in your situation. There is actual known science behind allergic reactions.”

 

The bottom line is, “eventually you will need to learn to trust others – at some point you just won’t be able to do it all by yourself. The trick is to figure out who you CAN trust, make sure they have the right information, and always have an emergency plan (meds, etc.),” said Colette Martin.

 

Find Recovery Options

 

After experiencing an incident like anaphylaxis, both kids and parents can experience fears around food moving forward.  Dr. Spotts acknowledged that getting over such fears “will take some time,” but “as your [child] logs in more successful experiences of checking out labels and having nothing happen, their confidence will build.” Dr. Spotts also recommended “seeing a therapist for the PTSD” if necessary, “thus empowering him and yourselves by actively addressing the allergy and the associated anxiety.”

 

Chris S. shared a series of photos she took in the hospital after her son suffered anaphylaxis from accidentally ingesting a bit of cheese.  Sarah of The Allergist Mom agreed with Chris S. that images are powerful: “Some of my most powerful lectures have included images of my children during allergic reactions. One person even told me that they didn’t really believe it until they saw it.”

 

Be Willing to Let Go of Anxiety

 

“I think as parents of kids with food allergies, we will always have anxiety…but all parents have anxiety. I have gone out of my comfort zone (after extensive means of making sure my child will be cared for/food allergies are understood) and I’ve been glad I did. For example, summer day camp is something we tried and it worked out,” said Jenny of Nut-Free Mom.

 

 

Resources

 

Dr. Jules Spotts website

 

The Food Allergy and Anaphylaxis Network website

 

Food Allergy Initiative website

 

Lori Sandler’s The Divvies Bakery Cookbook

 

Kelly Rudnicki’s The Food Allergy Mama Baking Book

 

Sloane Miller’s book, Allergic Girl

 

 

Other Topics of Interest

 

Read about maintaining a positive outlook on food allergies in this comment thread.

 

On helping kids with extreme food allergy anxieties, check out this comment thread.

 

For thoughts on outgrowing food allergies, read this comment thread.

 

Thinking about homeschooling kids with severe food allergies? Read this comment thread.

 

 

Filed Under: Research & Insights Tagged With: Food Allergies, Live Talks, Lori Sandler

Father’s Day Gift Ideas from Cool Mom Picks

June 5, 2012 by The Motherhood

With Father’s Day just around the corner, we were thrilled to have Kristen Chase and Liz Gumbinner of Cool Mom Picks join us in The Motherhood to offer us advice and inspiration on great gifts for dad.  Providing additional suggestions were Cool Mom Picks editors Christina and Delilah, along with Julie of The Mom Slant.

 

If you are looking for a Father’s Day gift, check out these fantastic suggestions.

 

Serve Dad breakfast in bed with Cool Mom Picks’ pancakes – and add a little ego boost with a “World’s Greatest Dad” sign!

 

 

 

For later in the day, perhaps you can serve Dad’s favorite beverage complete with a whimsical take on the traditional Father’s Day necktie theme.

 

 

More treats for dads with a sweet tooth: a TV remote all to himself for the day (or at least, a cookie in the shape of a remote), Guinness flavored cupcakes, and a bucket of Swedish fish for the fisherman in your kids’ life.

 

 

 

 

 

Looking for something a little more savory?  For Chef Dad, a french fry slicer.

 

If your father or husband is more into technology than treats, Cool Mom Picks and others had suggestions for him, too – like this Bluetooth-enabled audio system from Soundfreaq, or a personalized leather case for his iPhone.

If Dad has an inner geek and a great sense of humor, try visiting Superhero Supplies for fun Dad Superhero t-shirts and other items.  Cool Mom Picks also recommends this “You Are My Superhero” keychain and offers suggestions for funny out-of-the-box Father’s Day cards.

 

 

 

 

Get the kids involved in DIY gifts, too.  You can have young children decorate a memo pad for his desk or help draw or write a story in a nicely bound photo book.

 

 

Don’t forget to visit Cool Mom Picks to enter their fantastic giveaway for great Father’s Day prizes!!!

 

 

 

Whether you choose to buy or make a gift, send a card or simply spend some quality family time with Dad, we wish you a very happy Father’s Day!

Filed Under: News Tagged With: Cool Mom Picks, Father's Day, Gift ideas, Kristen Chase, Live Talks, Liz Gumbinner

Cancer Be Glammed: Surviving Cancer with Your Style Intact

May 22, 2012 by The Motherhood

Despite so many recent advances in treatment, no one ever wants to hear of a cancer diagnosis, for a friend, a family member, or oneself. And while the focus is necessarily on health, there’s so much more to who we are. Style, for one, and dignity—two things cancer can steal right along with health. Enter Lisa Lurie, CEO of Cancer Be Glammed and breast cancer survivor, whose site was born out of her own struggle to recover her health while maintaining her dignity and sense of style.

 

She’s put together in one place fashion solutions, lifestyle savers, post-op necessities and great gifts for cancer patients and survivors, and she joined us in The Motherhood to discuss her work. Lisa was joined by a panel of guests, including Kimberly of Pretty Pink Momma, Dawn of MommaKiss, Andrea of Lil Kid Things, Felicia of Go Graham Go, and Robyn of Robyn’s Online World.

 

 

What Not to Wear

 

Lisa shared some ideas for clothing to stock up on for the post-operative period. Favorite comfy t-shirts may no longer fit the bill following a mastectomy, as it may be difficult or forbidden to lift your arms over your head. Lisa says, “Button-down clothing or sleepwear is essential because it is easy to take on and off particularly if lymph node surgery is involved.” Also recommended are clothes that are soft, made from a fabric like cotton, without rough seams that might rub and irritate skin. Lisa offers, “My personal favorite following surgery is a great button down night shirt… It’s easy to take on and off and to wear. Find one in a great color. Floral is big this year!” Many options for post-op wear are available through Cancer Be Glammed.

 

How You Look Affects How You Feel

 

Just because comfort is king doesn’t mean good looks have to get kicked out of the palace. Women with and without cancer know that when you feel bad, looking better gives you a boost. Color is encouraged – Lisa says that warm, monochromatic colors enhance skin tone, especially during treatment.

 

Also, accessories are “a cancer girl’s best friend;” use them to draw focus away from areas you want to minimize and toward areas you want to highlight. Think gorgeous earrings, belts, shoes and jackets. And while it may be tempting to hide your body under clothes that are a little too big, Lisa cautions against it: clothes that just skim your body are more flattering and will help you look and feel better. For newly diagnosed women, she offers the downloadable style guide, “What the Doctor Didn’t Order” to help prepare them for the common, non-medical side effects of surgery and treatment. Bonus: it contains an easy to use shopping checklist!

 

Gifts that Keep on Glamming

 

Several talk participants were interested in learning about good gifts to support family, friends, and acquaintances with cancer.  Gifts of comfortable and attractive clothing, like the nightshirt Lisa mentioned, can be great for people we’re close to.  Coolibar, a brand that is available through Cancer Be Glammed, offers clothing for those who need stylish sun protection. Skin care products can also be a good option, but Lisa cautions to stick to products made for people going through treatment, such as Lindi Skin, also available through her site.

 

For people we may not have a close, personal relationship with, we may be uncomfortable buying intimate items like skin care products or clothes.  It’s easy to seem to withdraw from someone when you don’t know what to do for them, especially when it’s not someone you know terribly well – you don’t want to intrude. But you also don’t want to disappear.

 

Good gifts for acquaintances, or anyone, include gift cards for favorite stores or restaurants, or even dropping off a meal (especially one that can be frozen and reheated as needed). Lisa said an e-reader was her favorite gift: “You can send it yourself or as a group gift from family and friends. It is a welcome distraction during treatment and “bed” rest, the font can be enlarged for chemo tired eyes, you can purchase gift cards for books and magazines and it fits in a purse or chemo bag!” If your friend already has an e-reader, gift cards for books are a welcome present.

 

Another option, especially for patients who may not have a lot of family nearby to help, is to set up a schedule of helpers, cleaners, drivers, cooks – whatever is needed. Talk participant Maureen recommended Lotsa Helping Hands, a website that makes coordinating the effort easier. Sometimes (as anyone who’s ever had a baby remembers), the practical support is the most needed, and the hardest to ask for.

 

Thinking Pink (Or Not)

 

The conversation turned to that ubiquitous breast cancer color, of course. Many of us think pink in our zeal to show support for loved ones with breast cancer, but it may not be the best idea. Dawn of MommaKiss had a friend whose breast cancer was diagnosed in October, and she hated the color pink because “everywhere she turned, there was the reminder that she had breast cancer.”

 

Lisa says, “The color pink means different things to women going through cancer. That’s why I say it’s so personal. I am more low key as a person (I know that’s hard to believe), so I respect everyone’s choices.” The bottom line: don’t bombard someone you love with pink, unless you know she loves it and finds it meaningful in a positive way.  Dawn and other participants particularly liked that Cancer Be Glammed offers a variety of colors, not just a sea of pink.

 

I hope the day comes soon when no woman has to go through cancer. But until it does, thanks to Lisa and Cancer Be Glammed, the women who do will go through it with support – and with style.

Filed Under: Research & Insights Tagged With: Becki King, Cancer Be Glammed, Fashion, Lisa Lurie, Live Talks

Protecting Your Kids from Cyberbullying

May 21, 2012 by The Motherhood

Cyberbullying is an unfortunate side effect of childhood in the age of technology, and it can be tough to figure out how to protect your kids.  Today in The Motherhood, Dr. Elizabeth Englander, professor of psychology and founder and director of the Massachusetts Aggression Reduction Center at Bridgewater State University, talked with a group of concerned parents about dealing with cyberbullying.

 

“I actually don’t ONLY study cyberbullying – my focus has been on bullying and cyberbullying, which are really much more closely related than many people realize,” said Dr. Englander. “I’ve been studying violence and abuse in children for almost 25 years!”

 

Read the following Q&A with Dr. Englander and blogger co-hosts Victoria of The Mummy Chronicles, Lisa of Mommyality, Leticia of Tech Savvy Mama, Sarah of Sarah and Sons, and Christy of More Than Mommy for advice.

 

 

Q: At what age does this seem to start? Is it middle school or even younger now? (Victoria, The Mummy Chronicles)

 

Dr. Englander: Both bullying and cyberbullying begin in elementary school. In my research I started studying third graders and it was present in that grade – I didn’t study younger than third grade, but I think it is there too.  Cyberbullying in elementary school is related, btw, to cell phone ownership.

 

“We’ve seen it in our middle school. Quite frequently. Our Vice-Principal said that cell phone and Facebook issues take up more than half of his time now,” said Lisa of Mommyality.

 

Q: I’d like to hear your take on how cyberbullying is different from traditional bullying. This is a crusade of mine. (Christy, More Than Mommy)

 

Dr. Englander: Things have definitely changed in 25 years. 25 years ago, I was studying physical violence between boys. We didn’t even bother studying girls! Today, the focus is on cyberbullying and psychological bullying, and girls are very much involved. Unfortunately.

 

In a sense the cyber stuff HAS changed things, but the way to deal with it is really to be old-fashioned – not high tech. Kids have a lot of fantasies about online interactions. They need to understand the nature of what they do online – that NO MATTER WHAT THEIR SETTINGS, it is all totally public.

 

“Cyberbullying is hard because unlike physical bullying, the scars are emotional and more difficult to see rather than the physical bruises that come from typical bullying,” said Leticia of Tech Savvy Mama.

 

Q: I want to know how you start having the conversation about bullying in your homes. What things do you talk about about in real life bullying that aids the conversation around cyberbullying? (Leticia, Tech Savvy Mama)

 

Dr. Englander: One thing we do know is that CONVERSATION is the key to the whole issue. Begin by asking your kids, “I’ve heard a lot about bullying and meanness between kids….do you think that’s a problem at your school? What do you think about it?”

 

Q: Do boys or girls tend to be the worst offenders with cyberbullying? (Lisa, Mommyality)

 

Dr. Englander: We actually are particularly worried about the girls. There is data that supports the hypothesis that girls are weathering the online world worse than boys. Some of it is inadvertent – girls rely so much on digital communication, that they don’t realize that it can sometimes make small problems much worse. We need to begin by talking to girls about their friendships and asking them, “When do you think people should talk about things in person, INSTEAD of texting about them?”

 

“I think that it’s so dangerous for parents to not have at least a basic understanding of the online and mobile tools kids are using. I always recommend that parents empower their kids as teachers to learn more and to never be afraid of asking,” said Leticia of Tech Savvy Mama.

 

Q: It is easy to feel overwhelmed – and even scared – of all this! How can parents feel more in control and able to help their kids? (Cooper, The Motherhood)

 

Dr. Englander: 2 things my research has shown very clearly: first, most of it is simply NOT reported to adults. Kids prefer to go to their friends first for help.

 

Second, you’re not going to know everything your child does online. They can get online with many devices and in many settings. You may know what they do at home, but the possibilities for getting online are endless now. Education and discussion are the real answers in this day and age.

 

Also, I do think that parents should monitor what their kids do online – not to catch them doing something bad, but just so the child gets in the habit of remembering that what they do online is NOT private.

 

Q: What would you recommend as “steps” if you will leading from no computer usage (for younger kids) all the way up to having a phone and using social networks as they grow older? (uknowkids)

 

Dr. Englander: Bottom line is: keep to age-appropriate stuff. If you don’t approve of violence, they won’t wither away if you don’t let them do it. I would not let a child under 15 text or have internet access on their cell, because the rate of problems in under-15s is so high. They should use the Internet, and they can use FB, but you have to constantly flog away at how public it is and coach them to stop and think before they post ANYTHING.

 

Dr. Englander recommended visiting the Massachusetts Aggression Reduction Center website for resources on educating both parents and kids about cyberbullying.

Filed Under: Research & Insights Tagged With: cyberbullying, Elizabeth Englander, Live Talks

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