Calling Working Moms: De-Stress at the Lifestyle Redesign reTreat

March 14, 2012 by The Motherhood

Justice Fergie and a great group of women joined us in The Motherhood to talk about a fantastic 2012 getaway they’ve planned for working mothers – the Lifestyle Redesign reTreat!

If you’re interested in attending or just want to find out more, keep reading.

What is the reTreat?

According to event creator Justice Fergie, “The reTreat is meant to be a 2-day getaway for busy moms who are looking for tools and tips on simplifying their lives. I know I sure could use some!”

She went on, “The idea for it came to me when I was working my day job as a lawyer while being an entrepreneur AND managing a household, marriage and 3 small kids – I looked for an event like this, but couldn’t find one…so I created my own!”

When is it happening?

April 13-14, 2012.

What are some work-life balance issues the reTreat will help me work through?

“I have a problem with setting a realistic schedule for myself. I think there are more hours in the day than there really are!” said Lorraine, Run Wifey Run.

Added Dr. Nicole Cutts, therapist, success coach and artist, “One thing I think it’s important for us to understand is that multi-tasking well is also a myth. we need to give ourselves permission to focus on one thing at a time sometime and not expect everything to be perfect. Perfectionism is a set up for stress.”

Also mentioned by the group: Dealing with those mile-long “To Do” lists, prioritizing romantic relationships, getting enough sleep and taking one day at a time.

What can I expect at the reTreat?

“We’ll be covering themes like time management, self-care, personal image, family life, mom guilt and more during the retreat – it’s going to be an in-depth look at our lives as modern-day women. But we’ll also have time for pampering and FUN too,” said Justice Fergie.

She added, “The sessions will definitely provide the attendees with practical takeaways for them to implement as soon as they walk in the door back home.”

Where can I sign up?

Click here for the Lifestyle Redesign reTreat website.

Filming “Frozen Planet” in the Arctic — While Five Months Pregnant

March 13, 2012 by The Motherhood

Imagine spending two and a half years in the Arctic and Antarctic, braving -25 degree weather, filming penguins, polar bears and lesser known creatures like woolly bear caterpillars, as series producer of “Frozen Planet” on the Discovery Channel.

Vanessa Berlowitz has been there and done that, and she spent a fascinating 30 minutes in The Motherhood today answering questions and sharing her experiences.

“It really matters to me that moms like you engage with the kind of work that I do, because I absolutely believe that if we’re going to look after our planet, it will come down to women and mothers engaging their children with the natural world,” Vanessa told the group.

Read on for a brief Q&A based on our conversation with Vanessa.

Q: How long did it take to shoot this series? And how did you come to think, I should go to the North and South Poles to film whales, and penguins and polar bears? (Deborah)

VB: It took us 4 years to produce Frozen Planet, and 2 and 1/2 years of that was filming in the field. We tried to plan to do shoots all over the Arctic and Antarctic. We worked with lots of scientists to capture the best footage. We wanted to bring you penguins and polar bears but we also wanted to bring you really strange animals like woolly bear caterpillars so people could get a sense of how amazing the wilderness is.

Q: How could you survive that weather. . . pregnant??! (Amy, Teach Mama)

VB: I was 5 months pregnant when I went to the Norwegian Arctic. We were trying to film mother polar bears with really tiny cubs. I went to the doctor to make sure I was fit and healthy to go. Moms would say, is that a bit dangerous, are you putting your unborn baby at risk? But I really understood the risks involved and knew how to protect myself. When I was there, the guys made sure I didn’t carry anything, but I did have to spend days and days in a helicopter and I got a bit grumpy at times, but it was all worthwhile when we got to film polar bears. A new mom polar bear was struggling with the same thing we deal with – she had two naughty cubs … at one point she gently knocked one of her cubs in the snow to give him a time out. I was laughing so much because I thought this is what I’ve got to come, and I definitely picked up some tips from her.

Q: Which animal did you most enjoy watching and filming? (Liz, A Nut in a Nutshell)

VB: I most enjoyed filming orcas in Antarctica. I worked with a director who was filming them from the ice, and I was filming them in the air. There were pods of orcas trying to navigate their way through the ice. They would disappear and pop their heads up. And the penguins would run away from them. I knew these orcas weren’t trying to kill the penguins, they were hunting for fish, but clearly the penguins weren’t staying around to check that out.

It was really fun being with the penguins on the blue carpet for the Frozen Planet premiere in NYC. They reminded me of the penguins in Antarctica. The difference was, these penguins were really clean and they didn’t smell. Whereas, the penguins that I got to know in the Antarctic really smell – they stink of fish and prawns.

Q: Are you impervious to the cold, or really well outfitted?! (Emily)

VB: The clothes that you wear are really, really important. One of the key tips for staying warm in the cold is wearing loads and loads of layers. I used to average 10 different layers – 2 layers of silk close to the skin, then different weights of marino wool, then fleeces, then down, then GORE-TEX. When you get hot, you don’t allow yourself to sweat, you must take your layers off, to avoid hypothermia.

Q: So what was “re-entry” like for you, Vanessa? (Ilina, Dirt and Noise)

VB: One of the things that people underestimate is how tough it is to come back to the normal world. It’s tough for people like us who have been in the polar world, but also for our families. We had one team who was away for 5 months and the guy found it really tricky for him and his wife. Similarly, when I came home and tried to fit back into my family life, I found that my husband and my son had a new relationship. They didn’t really need me at first. It was quite difficult.

You know how as moms, you get so used to rituals and it helps you cope, because you think, OK, I need to do everything in a certain order? When I left my son for 2 1/2 months, I wrote an instruction manual that was something like 100 pages thick for my husband. And it analyzed every look that my son would make so my husband would know what to do. I put sticker notes all over the house saying “Stop! Does Cameron have his hat and gloves on? Stop! Why are you getting wine in the cellar, where is Cameron?” I came back and the house was an absolute mess, it looked like a bomb had gone off. But they had found a new routine. You realize that kids can survive perfectly well; they’re so adaptable, and they can cope with all kinds of change.

Q: My sons reminded me at breakfast to ask you their burning question: Did you see Santa? (Ilina, Dirt and Noise)

VB: I think we just missed Santa! We were out filming caribou at the time. Santa had gone off to do what he needed to do.

Q: What’s your NEXT project, Vanessa? Maybe somewhere tropical? (Kasey, All Things Mamma)

VB: I would love to make a series on the Seychelles, but instead, I’m already working on a special on grizzly bears in Alaska. I’m going to be spending lots of the summer out there on foot with these amazing animals.

“Frozen Planet,” a follow-up to the beloved “Planet Earth,” airs March 18 on the Discovery Channel. Check out this segment from the series:

http://youtu.be/QDpt9zVwKU0

Aging and Midlife Beauty: Dissecting the ‘Demi Moore Dilemma’

March 12, 2012 by The Motherhood

At any age, women can feel pressure to conform to Hollywood standards of beauty – but as actresses like Demi Moore and Heather Locklear have demonstrated, that pressure seems to intensify as we get older.

In The Motherhood today, Dr. Vivian Diller, Ph.D. and author of “Face It: What Women Really Feel As Their Looks Change,” led us through a fascinating exploration of aging and midlife beauty.

As Jamie of Blonde Mom Blog said, “Beauty and confidence really do come from within. Our society just places so much value on looks and being beautiful – meaning, being ‘youthful.’ I think it’s up to all of us to dispel that myth!”

Your Self-Image Matters

Rising above the cultural insistence that youth = beauty doesn’t mean women should write off their emotions about their changing physical appearance. Dr. Diller pointed out, “Too many women dismiss their complicated feelings about the issue of an aging appearance as irrelevant, silly or superficial.”

She noted that as we live longer – and outlive our historical role to “attract a mate and procreate” – “We are trying to redefine what it means to be attractive, vital women in our 50s, 60s, 70s and beyond. There are few role models.”

Finding Older Beauty Role Models

Aging gracefully doesn’t have to mean giving up on maintaining your health. “My mom is in her 70s and does yoga daily…she is a testament to taking care of yourself and the benefits of exercise,” said Jamie of Blonde Mom Blog.

And then there’s 90-year-old Iris Apfel, who just signed on for an ad campaign with MAC Cosmetics.

“I recently wrote a story about Iris Apfel for a beauty website and spent scads of time combing through images of her and loving every minute of it. She is such an inspiration!” said Victoria of The Mummy Chronicles.

Taking More Drastic Steps

Above and beyond maintaining your health to maintain beauty, more and more often, women are turning to Botox, plastic surgery, drugs and other products and procedures.

Most of the group agreed that they have no objections to cosmetic procedures done for a person’s own self-confidence. “I think if someone wants to have Botox or injections to feel better about themselves they should definitely do it,” noted Aracely of Daytripping Mom.

But Victoria of The Mummy Chronicles pointed out that she would examine the underlying reasons for seeking surgery. “I wouldn’t say that I would not consider it and I can understand how actresses feel pressured to look a certain way and/or age. However, I think the extreme measures are a sign of that lack of confidence. You are insecure about something if you are going to extremes in surgery.”

Agreed Beth of Anti-Supermom, “I hope that Botox and plastic surgery are done with only you in mind and with you feeling beautiful. Not beautiful in others’ eyes.”

“The reason why I go out to talk to women is to provide them information about what they may be feeling, underneath the defensiveness and fear about this subject,” responded Dr. Diller.

Be Honest with Yourself

It can be jarring, as Emily said, to look in the mirror as you get older and see a face you don’t recognize. Dr. Diller pointed out, “We all have to mourn our youthful appearance – it’s about letting go of a self image that does change over time, no matter what we do. Unless we do that, we get caught in the fear of loss. When we mourn, we make room for something else to move in its place.”

She went on to note that not everyone has a positive attitude about aging. “Why would 11 billion dollars be spent on anti-aging cosmetics? Why would there be a steep rise in the number of women under 30 getting cosmetic surgery? Sometimes I have to remember that the stats don’t line up with what I hear women say. That concerns me. It’s why I want to keep the conversation going toward why this whole issue seems so hard for some.”

Remember Who’s Watching

As tough as it might be for you, remember to watch what you say aloud. Beauty messages bombard our daughters from all angles, and they absorb everything they see and hear from us.

“Before this talk, one of my readers brought up the discussion of airbrushing for magazines,” said Leigh of Hines Sight Blog. “It would be nice if we could see a little more reality. I know stars look good, but the magazines make them look really good, sometimes too good. It really starts to impact a girl’s thoughts at a young age. Too much perfection.”

Agreed Jamie of Blonde Mom Blog, “I showed my girls a recent video (I believe it was from Dove) showing a model getting totally made over in Photoshop. We had a good discussion about how what they see in magazines is NOT real. These images are not what women really look like.”

“As a mom to 3 girls I have toted them all to the gym with me since they were 8 weeks and they know when I’m about to go running,” said Victoria of The Mummy Chronicles. “I always tell them that I do it so I can be there for them and keep up with them. ‘Mommy wants to be healthy and strong!’ I try to never make it a weight/looks issue.”

Cooper added, “I was recently at an event where an expert said that for every one ‘you’re pretty,’ our daughters hear from us, they should hear three messages about strength, character, brains etc.”

Keep Learning about Midlife Beauty

Dr. Diller will appear on the TODAY Show this Thursday, March 15, at 8:09 a.m. ET to talk about “Ageless Beauty” and authenticity.

You can also read her latest article on this topic on the Huffington Post or check out her book.

14 Tips For Budget-Friendly Weeknight Cooking from America’s Test Kitchen and The Motherhood

March 6, 2012 by The Motherhood

In celebration of the release of America’s Test Kitchen’s new cookbook, Simple Weeknight Favorites, Senior Book Editor Suzannah McFerran led a Live Talk in The Motherhood on healthy, tasty, budget-friendly and, most important, easy recipes for weeknight cooking.

“Most of the recipes (from the new cookbook) can be prepared under 30 minutes, all of them are under 45 minutes. The concept was: Dinner on a page, minimal ingredients,” said Suzannah of America’s Test Kitchen.

Suzannah’s Tips for Saving Time in the Kitchen

1.) Jump-start. “Vegetables can be jump-started in the microwave then finished in the oven … same with rice. Here’s an example: Risotto – no tedious stovetop stirring!”

2.) Skillet pastas. “We cook the pastas in the sauce to flavor the pasta and minimize pots.”

3.) Ingredients that play double duty. “Make a marinade for chicken, reserve some for the salad, and then use it to give a final boost of flavor to the chicken at the end. (Important note: reserve BEFORE you marinate!)”

4.) Peel and cut certain veggies ahead of time. “Carrots for sure. Zucchini, onions are fine. Ones to be careful of are the ones that oxidize.”

5.) Go for the thigh. “Chicken thighs are a lot cheaper than breasts and we love to cook with them here. They are also harder to screw up!”

More great ideas from the wonderful bloggers who co-hosted the live event:

6.) Make Beans and Rice a Menu Staple. “Rice and beans is superbly nutritious, easy to make and everyone will eat it. Leftovers can be made into quesadillas, cooked with an egg from breakfast or used as taco or enchilada filling.” (Kate, Kate in the Kitchen)

7.) Short on Time? “In a pinch, I get the organic frozen rice from Trader Joe’s and pop in the microwave for a fluffy, delish side dish.” (Beth, Real Moms Love to Eat)

8.) Introduce Your Tastebuds to Quinoa. “Quinoa is usually found in the grain aisle with rices and is cooked like rice. It is a great backdrop for healthy flavors.” (Kelsey, The Naptime Chef)

9.) The Freezer is Your Friend. “I like to make meals ahead and freeze them – cook [staples like rice and quinoa] until just cooked. That way they aren’t overcooked when you pull them out and thaw them.” Click here for easy, freezer-friendly recipes. (Tricia, Once A Month Mom)

10.) Think Squash. “I love to roast 3 or 4 butternut squashes early in the week with some olive oil and maple syrup. Then I use the cut up squash in all my dishes for the week: soup, risotto, or just as a delicious side.” (Vanessa, Chef Druck Musings)

11.) Get Out the Slow Cooker. “The slow cooker is a wonderful helper for those busy nights. Anytime I know my time will be limited, I’ll set something up to cook in there when there’s still time in the morning. Dinner’s waiting when I get home.” (Julie, Mommie Cooks)

12.) Buy Meat in Bulk. “Pork is an inexpensive meat that tastes great. I buy large value packs of pork cutlets for quick weeknight dinners.” (Vanessa, Chef Druck Musings)

13.) Add Eggs to the Mix. “You can throw anything in with a pot of scrambled eggs (or an omelette) super quick!” (Julie, Mommie Cooks)

14.) Toss in Everything but the Kitchen Sink. “Stir fries are simple, fast and a good way to use up odds and ends of vegetables.” (Kate, Kate in the Kitchen)

To Whet Your Appetite

Three of Suzannah’s top picks from Simple Weeknight Favorites:

Coffee-Rubbed Rib Eye Steaks with Creamy Slaw.
A little sugar speeds up and ensures browning for quick cooking steaks.

Chicken Thighs with Fennel, Orange and Olives
Jump-start roasting of veg in oven, brown chicken on stovetop – then finish in oven so flavors can meld – thighs are cheap and more flavorful – hard to mess up!

Moroccan Fish and Couscous Packets
Flavorful sauce, fish goes on top. No searing or splattering mess in the kitchen for a delicious fast fish dinner!

Other great weeknight options:

One-dish sausage and spinach pasta, by Julie of Mommie Cooks

Roasted chicken and root veggies, by Kim of My Cup of Creativi-tea

Spaghetti primavera, by Beth of Real Moms Love to Eat

Slow cooker recipes you might try:

Slow cooker beef bourguignon, by Vanessa of Chef Druck Musings

Italian beef sandwiches, by Diane Campagna

Taco chicken chili, by JesicaD

And what’s dinner without dessert? For a sweet end to your meal, try out ATK’s Family Baking Book and Blue Ribbon Desserts.

See the Simple Weeknight Favorites recipes on display in the America’s Test Kitchen Facebook gallery, and get a behind-the-scenes peek at America’s Test Kitchen here:

Here’s the full transcript of the Talk with Suzannah from America’s Test Kitchen, the great blogger co-hosts and The Motherhood community.

And here’s a wonderful post from America’s Test Kitchen about the Live Talk, as well! Aren’t they cool?!?

Catch the ZZZ Train: Tips for a Better Night’s Sleep

March 5, 2012 by The Motherhood

Insomnia. Sleep apnea. Night terrors. General anxiety.

Any number of issues can keep you awake at night. If you suspect that you’re having trouble sleeping because of a medical condition, you should talk with your doctor. But if your lack of sleep is thanks to hyperactive kids or a racing mind, keep reading!

Guests from the Bedtime Network and a great group of bloggers shared their best sleep suggestions in The Motherhood today, and we’ve picked our top 10 favorite tips to share with you.

1.) Don’t caffeinate after noon. “Avoid coffee and other caffeinated drinks after 12 in the afternoon. It can take nine hours or more for the body to digest caffeine,” said Lisa Mercurio of the Bedtime Network.

2.) Take advantage of your kids’ natural sleepiness. With the kids asleep, you have more time to relax and unwind before your own bedtime. “I’m always trying to catch the kids when they are at that ‘just right for sleep’ moment!” said Stephanie of Mamma Bear’s World.

3.) If that fails, manufacture some sleepiness. “I used to give my boys milk every night before bed. It was a great way to have an excuse to also sit down and cuddle (can’t run around w/a cup of milk in your hand!)” said Amanda of Parenting by Dummies.

4.) Unplug. “Just remember that when the kids are finally in bed not to use your down time diving into technology, as this can further make you feel that your day has not ended,” said Nyiri Grigorian of the Bedtime Network. “Technology and staying plugged in is one of the major problems with having a smooth transition to sleep. It also deprives us of much needed alone time before bed.”

5.) Clear your mind. “I try to meditate before I go to bed for at least 5-10 minutes,” said Kayla. “It’s hard at first because you keep thinking about things, but come back to the quiet and it starts to get easier!”

6.) Watch what you eat – and drink. “Try to avoid alcohol. It’s not a relaxer. It’s actually a stimulant,” said Lisa of the Bedtime Network. “Also, sleeping on a full stomach leads to a bad night’s sleep.”

7.) Create a bedtime ritual. “I like to turn off the lights, play soft music on Pandora and light candles,” suggested Shannon of Potamus Prefers.

8.) Wind down with the family pet. “One thing that does help me to really relax at night is spending time petting our dog,” said Amanda of Parenting by Dummies. “She’s sooooo soothing when she cuddles up on the floor by my feet!”

9.) Tune into white noise. To drown out irritating nighttime sounds like a snoring partner, “I do have an air purifier next to my side of the bed, and that humming helps out some,” said Stephanie of Goober Monkey.

10.) Sleep elsewhere if you need to. “Sometimes my husband can really snore, and I leave the room. It’s not all the time, but it does help!” said Stephanie of Mamma Bear’s World.

We’ll be putting these tips to use in our own bedtime routines!

What helps you fall asleep at night?